Habits, Personality and Elder Abuse

A couple of things started me thinking about habits and personality this morning.  First, an article in our local (state) paper on elder abuse:  with a population of under 1 million, our little state had, in a twelve month period, 1,000 reports of elder abuse, and only 1 in 5 incidences are ever reported.  That is 5,000 instances of abuse.  Victims nationwide lose an estimated $2.6 billion from financial abuse and exploitation.

The second item was a discussion with Honey about the recent influx of scam emails we have been receiving purporting to be from a large prominent bank informing us that our account has been placed on hold and we must update our info in order to re-activate.  A thoughtful link to thebank.com is provided.  But if you put your cursor over the link, you are shown the actual url, which is to some obviously spurious location that is imitating thebank.com.  Upon checking our account, it was, of course, just fine.  I tried to forward one of these emails to the real bank site (they have an email address to which you can forward scams), but the email was somehow locked and unforwardable.  Slick.

So, here is the link to habits and personality.  I explained to Honey that when I receive a REAL email from thebank informing me that our bill is due, I never use the embeded link, even though I know this is the real deal.  It is my HABIT.  I go to the web site via what I know to be the real link to transact business.  Habitually.  Don't even have to think about it.  Just do it.  It is a feature of my personality to be skeptical, to never assume that what I see is what really is.

I believe that our personalities are, to a large extent, formed from a collection of habits (my psych friends may correct me on this).  Habits are difficult to un-learn.  And thus this aspect of my personality, these habits, will, I hope, carry over into my elderhoodedness and, perhaps, protect me from being susceptible to scams and elder abuse.

As I wrote earlier, I think that forming these kinds of habits now, while alert and facile, will enhance the experience of elding, and make for a more safe and secure eldertime.  While no guarantee, at the least it will improve my chances of same safeness and security.

By the way, elder (age 62 and above) abuse comes in the form of:  physical, emotional, financial, sexual, neglect, self-neglect, and the withholding of access to the good wine.  Now, Honey, where did you put the key to the celler?

Michael

Signs and Symptoms of Elder Abuse - look for these in your friends:

• Unexplained physical injury
• Agitation, trembling, confusion, disorientation (not to be confused with too much scotch)
• Emotional distress like crying, depression
• Withdrawn, shows no emotion
• Self-destructive behavior (not to be confused with too much scotch)
• Social and physical isolation
• Unexplained loss of financial independence and/or control
• Home is disarray, lacks basic necessities (no to be confused with too little scotch)
• Appears fearful of caregiver
• Appears reluctant to respond when questioned, or caregiver seeks to prevent elder from interacting privately with you
• Elder and caregiver give conflicting accounts of incidents
• Caregiver is indifferent or angry towards elder and refuses to provide necessary assistance
• Caregiver locks up the good wine and hides the key